“Ode to Loneliness” Imagine singing (screaming) at a pitch no one else could hear Imagine existing wholly and completely alone in a universe with billions of other life forms Sometimes I’m scared to breathe out because I wonder if this time my breath will be a scream I’m scared if I scream no one’s going to hear me People ask me often about the tattoo on the back of my neck What I tell them is “I like whales” when what I mean is I cried for an hour the first time I ever heard about The Loneliest Whale in the World I wanted to find the deepest spot in the ocean point to the bottom swallow my fear say “there” and dive because the loneliest girl should befriend the loneliest whale (I know he can hear me) (I am convinced I will hear him) I wanted the waves hissing along the shore to instead echo with my grief because if a tree falls and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound If a foghorn calls out in the dark and nothing answers back is it really standing there And if I cry out my pain on a crowded planet and no one turns to find me am I actually here None of the other whales can hear him Ray Bradbury wrote “The Foghorn” in 1951 39 years before the 52-hertz whale was ever heard A sea monster wailed back to the foghorn convinced it was alone in the world and destroyed the one thing that made it believe that maybe it wasn’t alone after all (I have to tell him he’s not alone) Maybe Ray Bradbury knew Maybe the lonely people always know I am the girl standing at the edge of the ship (like I am always on the edge) with my back to the lighthouse that’s still calling me back to safety and I’m screaming at the captain “dive!” and he’s yelling back “this isn’t a submarine!’ And I’m laughing And I’m crying And I’m begging “Do it anyway” (because I need to find him) (because I need someone to find me) I am the girl always on the edge Always willing to dive And sometimes I am the whale Sometimes I am the sea monster I am always the foghorn, desperate to be heard, endlessly singing (echoing) back to myself